Patience and the Mother Sparrow
Hello Dear Ones!
I am writing today from my deck, seated in blissful sunlight. I am listening to the songbirds, the wind, and our windchimes. I thought I’d really dig into the idea of patience today. It’s been coming up for me again and again and again lately.
Let’s just lay this on the table. I once created a belief about myself that I am impatient. My identity has been that I am a fierce yet impatient powerhouse. I have an idea, I envision it, then I make it happen (as soon as humanly possible). I have often been just so fierce, so dogged… and… well… impatient. It used to be hard to wait when I saw a thing in my mind and then applied myself to making it happen. I used to have a hard time waiting in the “in-between”, the time between vision and completion. I see now that this is changing. Patience is arriving in my lap, and perhaps it always has been with me. I just haven’t embraced it until now. In my usual style, here are some little vignettes to illustrate, and then I’ll follow with questions.
When I decided to open my integrative medicine clinic in Alaska, it all happened so quickly. I needed it done ASAP. I was too excited to take my time. So, I hustled and made it happen. Just three months later, the doors opened to the public. I needed it to be alive in my life, and so it was. Same with the call to leave Alaska. Boom! One day it was as clear as day that it was time to move. Within four months I had closed my clinic, sold nearly everything from that practice and from our home, made renovations to our house, sold it, and then flew off to Massachusetts. Clarity came, and I just made it happen.
All of that was the past version of Rebecca. However, something new is happening now. Yes, I still feel very driven, but patience also lives within me. Here are some examples (and I am sharing them in case these little stories awaken something in you, help you to see patience showing up in your life).
There is a mama sparrow who chose to make a nest for her babies on the curve of a downspout, right next to the window by my kitchen sink. Since I handwash our dishes, she and I connect many times a day. Sometimes she is comfortable flying into the nest while I am at the sink, but more often I see her hover in mid air, eye me strongly, then fly off to a nearby perch to wait her turn. Sometimes, when I have seen her swooping up to her nest, I choose to step away and wait patiently. It feels like a lovely sharing of space. She, patiently awaiting her babies, patiently waiting her turn in our shared space. I stand witness to her patience, and then offer the same kindness when I can.
Having come out of living in Alaska for 12 years, I am now recognizing the depth of sun deprivation from all those years. I am waking up to the fact that I am still very sun deprived. I have such thirst for sun. Passing clouds, thunderstorms and even the nighttime sky challenge me. I am learning patience as I wait for clouds or storms to pass. I am truly learning patience as I wait for the sun to rise again, for my sunshine tanks to refill over time.
When we moved here, I envisioned big gardens. Having dreamed of growing peaches and blackberries and asparagus for years and years, I finally planted them when we arrived. The asparagus and blackberries take 2-3 years to begin to bear. Last year was a tiny beginning harvest, this year a true harvest is upon us. And our baby peach tree: 20 tiny peaches!!! I’ve waited patiently, in joyful anticipation of these favorites. Gardens are so wonderful for teaching patience.
As I practice patience, I am noticing the beauty in it. I am in gratitude for all the ways the lessons and opportunities for patience come up. The slowing down, the knowing it will come, the waiting for, the joyful anticipation… it can be extraordinary, perhaps just as wonderful as experiencing the completion itself.
And what is it like to finally receive the thing I’ve awaited? Delicious. Such a delicious feeling fills me as the awaited vision/dream/moment arrives into the present. The patience makes it all the more incredible to receive.
So I wonder:
How do you define yourself? As patient or impatient? And how has this served you? (or not served you!)
Are there examples in your life now that are beckoning you to notice the beauty and joy embedded in the process of patiently waiting?
Where in your life would practicing more patience not only help you, but perhaps start to change how you engage with life (big question, I know, but why not ask it?!)
Here’s to each of us learning again and again how to patiently await whatever we have desired, dreamed, and envisioned.
In deep gratitude for everything in this sweet life,
Rebecca
* Disclaimer: This likely goes without saying, but I'll say it anyway: Everything I write is for educational purposes only. Nothing I write or share can be deemed diagnostic or medical advice. Nothing I write or share can replace your own healthcare providers or your own internal knowing and wisdom. Period. Please seek tailored medical care and advice via your skilled healthcare team whenever you need it.
